woke up mad. i’m fucking pissed. i don’t know why. but i am. fucking enraged. i want to leave. this is not cool. i don’t know what the fuck to do. i’m angry. i want to beat the fuck out of something. sflsa lsar lsa vasrla’ls fuck. dkhfaksldhgf. god this is not fucking cool. i’m already tired of being on this fucked up medicine. my emotions are everywhere. i don’t fucking care. i’m just pissed off and angry and i have no one to run to. the only pereson i do is late for work or something, let alone he’s dealing with his own shit. i need some sturdy fucking ground. seirously. i’m soooo god damn angry. i hate it. ellkesfdaklshdfkjahsdfkjahadskjfhaskdjfh.
baby, i know you're excited/nervous to take this new medication because you think it will help. However, for me. . . I had to stop taking them. I hated how I lost my mind. I lost it even more than I have ever had to start off with. The way I thought...the complexity. .. was gone. I felt like my mind had lost it's beauty. I hope this doesn't happen to you. I love you.
actually, i’ve been terrified. i hate it. i’ve felt nothing all day. nothing and hurt. i’ve sat all day. i don’t like it.
“I love you…And I’m sorry I can’t give you an answer. Something tells me to walk away, but I can’t see me in someone else’s bed or you in someone else’s arms. That thought enrages me. I need some time baby. Please, please, if you ever start thinking stupidly, Please get ahold of me. I love you. There’s no question about that. It scares me. You scare me. But you’re so important to me. Even if we don’t talk or see eachother, thinking about you melts my bullshit hard exterior. I’m just spooked Amanda. I just need some time. I love you.”—(might i just ask why, no day but today.)